THURSDAY 26 FEBRUARY – Woke up late and had to rush to the supermarket for coffee and milk in preparation for my session with CPN today. Long one, all about attachment. How various people have influenced my life. Three positives, three negatives. My father who was never there, except to take me to fortnightly football games. Wow, an average of 90 minutes a week. A step-mother who never wanted children and pushed my head down the toilet because she didn’t lock the door and I walked in. Son’s mother the alcoholic who so influenced my early days and then abandoned him with my father for a weekend and turned up 18 months later. My wife, still to this day though we haven’t met for 17 years, who went through war with our four month old. And then there’s Natasha and her wonderful son, who I lost through the idiocies of immigration. Ever since whom I’ve been alone and suffering evermore from my addiction and mental health. My Dual-Diagnosis. And tonight, to cap it all off, I get threatened with a motorbike chain in my own home, and that I’ll be stabbed in the back as I walk up town by a person who shouldn’t even be acceptable in the project where I live. So it was police, CPN, out-of-hours house management and a disturbed sleep. What an eventful 24 hours. 86400 triggers and negatives well survived. Let me reword that. 86400 addiction triggers and 86400 mental health triggers. So, it’s actually a whopping 172800 moments of madness avoided as best I could without a pick-up or thought on the darker side.
Tags: Alcohol Addiction Recovery Mental Health Cross-addiction Dual-diagnosi
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