this is a lesson for us all.tell those you love,that you love them,as much as possible.nothing is forever,the deepest pains,are those we never thought could,or would happen.mary,he obviously knew you loved him,and im sure he knew,you were just releasing feelings you were having at the time.nobody is perfect,and nobody can read the future.i have loved and lost,there will always be a hole ,where that person was.but i can laugh now,at the situations we were in,and remember,the times ,that helped define us,as humans.your journey,is not over,you have a path to walk,and a life to live.this pain will,lesson with time,but it will always be there.and it starts to fade,when you learn to just let that person go.it took me over a year,of anger,and depression,to realize this,and im still not over it,entirely.i  am sorry,for your loss,and the pain that has come in waves.there is nothing that can be said,to make it easier..hug those you love,tell them what they mean to you.you never know,when it will be for the last time.

At the time, those blogs  were right for you,  it helped you and your husband at that time.

When we put our feelings or thoughts that are troubling us down in writing, it aids us, to better see any obstacles that stand in front of us.  Removing obstacles  by writing is an act of love,  enabling you to approach with an understanding, of  compassion;  a recognition of a love that is, complete, strong, unmeasured, unbounded and timeless.

A tough bitch?, or someone that was hurting, doing their best to cope,  someone who was tough enough to be there, for someone they cared for. Sounds like a wonderfully strong and loyal woman to me, a woman that a husband would be proud to have as a wife beside him.

You were there for him then, and you are there for him now, dressed very nice; with make up done to the best that you can and with that is the never late,  always there, shown right on time! LOVE!